Home Again

We got released from the hospital yesterday afternoon. The doctor was impressed with how quickly Brooklyn recovered from one day to the next. Monday she was breathing so much better than she was Sunday night, it was great to see. We were in isolation again because they weren't sure if the pneumonia was a viral or bacterial infection so they didn't want us to spread it to anyone else on the floor. It was nice to be in isolation because we got our own room again, but hard because we couldn't leave or walk around anywhere. We played in our room & watched a lot of movies to pass the days. It was wonderful to have one of our good friends as our nurse both Saturday and Sunday, taking care of us all through the night. Mike came back and forth to the hospital so that he could go see the other kids at my parents too since he hadn't seen them all week. Monday, the doctors felt like Brooklyn was ready to go home. Her pneumonia had gotten smaller based on the x-ray of her lung and her oxygen levels and heart rate were much better too. We had to pick up two antibiotics for her from the pharmacy and she felt good enough to walk down there on her own. It was the most exercise she had had in 3 days! She even felt good enough to walk out to the parking garage, and I was very appreciative because I was carrying all of our stuff, so it would've been tough to carry her too! Ever since we got admitted to the hospital, all she had been looking forward to was going to her GaGa and PaPa's house when she got out because that is where the other kids had been staying, so when we got to leave Monday, we drove right there. It was fun to get to see everyone, Braden and Kayla had made posters for her and Kelsey wanted to sit with her wherever she went. Brookie was so sweet too because she had gotten 3 new stuffed animals while she was in the hospital and she gave one to each of her siblings. She took time picking which should go to which kid - it just warmed my heart to see her thinking of her brother and sisters while she was going through such a yucky time. I ran to do some grocery shopping while the kids were at my parents' house so I wouldn't have to take them out to the store today and then we went home. Mike got home from work just a little after we did and it was so good to all sit at the table and eat dinner together again. We felt very blessed and thankful. Today my cousin's son flew out from Wisconsin to spend Thanksgiving with us. He was diagnosed with Lymphoma 2 weeks before Brooklyn was diagnosed with Leukemia back in January. He did amazingly well with his treatments and is cured! He started his freshman year of college this fall and felt like he wanted to come out to see Brooklyn for his Thanksgiving break. The kids are so excited to have him here and Brooklyn seems to feel an immediate bond with him, sitting next to Nate on the couch and at the dinner table. We are so happy to get to spend the holiday with him. Brooklyn is off chemo again for the rest of the week as she finishes out her antibiotics. We are trying to take it easy for the rest of the week so she can relax and get better. It is hard to keep her down though, she was up and playing most of the day today. It's good to see her so full of energy though, it makes all of us happy.

Flying Solo

"I did it!" That's the first thing I thought when I woke up this morning. You see, my parents and aunt and uncle have been gone all week on vacation and Mike has been gone since Wednesday so I've been flying solo. It's not like I don't think I can take care of my kids by myself, I am with them every single day and manage to get them to and from school and their sports & activities just fine. But Mike does a lot to help with the kids in the morning and at night, and is always on top of giving Brooklyn her medicine. We are a great team and I am so thankful for all he does, and my parents are always so helpful whenever we need them. I knew we would be fine on our own, but the little fear that we might need to go to the hospital made me nervous. I would have to find someone to watch the other kids, get them where they needed to be, go to the ER on my own, all of that. And Braden had minimum days all week, so he still went to school at normal time but then he got out an hour after Kayla, so there was a lot of running back & forth. One day I thought it would be fun for the 4 of us girls to walk to school to get Braden. The kids are always saying they want to walk, and we didn't have any plans that we needed to hurry home for, so I figured it would be a good day to try it. Why did I think that? Brooklyn wanted to ride her scooter but was going to slow & kept stopping to rest so I made her get in the stroller with Kelsey which made her cry almost the entire rest of the walk. Then Kayla got tired of walking, so she jumped on the stroller too. So, for the biggest hill on the way to school I was pushing all three girls and the scooter and sweating like I was running a marathon. My arms were practically straight over my head because the hill was so steep. I'm sure we were quite the scene. The walk home was much easier since it was all downhill. I let Brooklyn ride her scooter again and she kept saying 'this is the best day eder!' I reminded her that she had just been crying her head off five minutes earlier but she didn't seem to care anymore. We actually had a great few days together. Braden got to play at a couple friends' houses, Kayla had girl scouts, Kelsey had gym class and Brooklyn went to school and I even got to get some closets organized that desperately needed it! My parents got home this morning at about 1:30am and Mike landed tonight at 6:30pm so when I woke up this morning, it was so reassuring to know that things would all be back to normal tonight. Brooklyn has slept with me the last two nights because she has been on steroids again this week and they always seem to mess with her sleep. Wednesday night I think I was up with her 5 times taking her back to bed, so it was easier to just let her sleep with me. When she got up this morning she said she didn't "teel" good, so I took her temperature when we got downstairs and it was 102. I called the doctor and called my parents and we got into the ER about 10:00. She was complaining that her stomach hurt and she's had a little cold all week so they did their normal blood culture draw and then she had a chest X-ray. We watched Sleeping Beauty in our room in the ER but she wasn't feeling good so she slept on & off. Then they wanted to do an ultrasound on her stomach since in was bothering her. Her fever kept coming back and was still high, even after getting Tylenol, so they decided we would be admitted. Before we came upstairs, she also had a cat scan so they could check all her organs. The poor thing has been through more today than any 3 year old should have to experience. We finally got into our room tonight at about 7:30. It was a long day in the ER. Mike landed and came straight to the hospital, so he got here about 8:00. The doctors came in a little later and said that Brooklyn has pneumonia. Her breathing has been really rapid and shallow today, so I think that is what they were so concerned about. She is doing fine now, Mike brought her some powdered sugar donuts and when she ate one at 9:00, it was the first thing she ate all day. We will probably be here for a couple days but I am so thankful that everyone is back home safe & sound. It will be good to be all under one roof again.

Are You New?

Mike and I will tease each other by saying that sometimes. Like in a situation where the other person should know the right response or answer but for some reason, aren't getting it. We like to joke around, so it's a way for us to be like - did you just get here? Why do you not know that answer? Have you not been the parent with me this whole time? :) We kind of were asking each other that question this weekend. But first, I'll go back. Friday the kids didn't have school so I took them to play at a park we haven't been to before. It was so great to have a slow morning and get to play and hang out and have fun. We went to frozen yogurt for lunch and then ran to the store. The weather started to get colder then so we came home and the kids curled up and watched a movie while I did some work around the house. We had some friends over for dinner that night and it was fun to visit and let the kids all play. Saturday was one of our first weekends without soccer so it was great to sleep in and not have to get out of the house so early. We had a relaxing morning and then thought it would be fun to take a family trip to the mall. Mike had bought me a watch for our anniversary so we thought it would be a good idea to go get it sized and walk around a little and go to dinner. Really? Are you new? For crying out loud do you think we could go to a more heavily populated place than the mall on a Saturday afternoon? Mike was dying and regretting our decision-making as we watched Brooklyn touch everything in sight. We decided to leave and went across the street to an open air area where they have a fountain that has water with lights that is coreagraphed to music. It was good to be outside & the kids loved watching the water dance. Then we went to one of our favorite places for dinner, but once again - dinner at a crowded restaurant on a Saturday night? Ugh. The kids did remarkably well in the restaurant, but Brookie did get tired and cranky toward the end of dinner. We got them home and into bed before it was too late, so that was good. We decided not to go to church Sunday morning because my parents and aunt & uncle are out of town so we would've had to bring Brooklyn into church with us and we just didn't want to expose her to so many people again since we just had the night before. I ran out to do some errands but everyone else just stayed home to play & rest. Kelsey has had a cold for a week now so she hasn't been feeling great and Brooklyn woke up with a runny nose Sunday morning and was kind of wheezing too.  By that evening, it was obvious she wasn't feeling well and was starting to get a fever. She had a hard time sleeping very soundly so I ended up sleeping in bed with her most of the night and miraculously her fever actually went down. This morning we went to see her oncologist for her regular monthly appointment, and then she got her chemo in the infusion room. After picking up Braden and Kayla from school, some friends watched the kids while Mike and I went to their parent teacher conferences. They are both doing wonderfully in school & we are so proud of them. They have had a lot to deal with in the last year with moving, starting a new school, making new friends and their sister getting cancer. We are so happy that they have adjusted to everything so well and are doing such a good job with it all. Brooklyn wasn't feeling very well again tonight, but it was another busy day for her. It is hard to remember that we need to slow down for Brooklyn when everything else in life is still going so fast. It's been 9 months, but I guess sometimes I am still new to all of this.

Back on Track

It has been so great to be home and be back to our regular life again. Brooklyn's home nurse came out on Thursday, the day after we got home from the hospital to make sure she was doing okay and again on Monday to draw her labs. Her counts all came back good, which was great news since she had been battling a virus all week. She even started back with her chemo Monday night, so that was good to get her back on track. When I asked our nurse about any fear of relapse of the leukemia since she was off her chemo for a week, she said they don't worry about it when kids are off treatment for such a short period of time and that it is not unusual for kids to have to be off chemo for up to four weeks sometimes. The older kids had a minimum day on Monday for Halloween and I got to work in Kayla's class for their party so that was fun. They all got to wear their costumes to school and had a parade and I'm sure didn't get much work done at all, but they had a great time and it was fun to see the kids all dressed up. That night we went trick-or-treating in our neighborhood for the first time (since we didn't live her last year). I was trying to teach Kelsey to say 'trick or treat' during the day and she came up with something that sounded kind of similar. :) Braden was a GI Joe Ninja, Kayla was a witch, Brooklyn was Rapunzel and Kelsey was a gnome. Brooklyn's Rapunzel wig turned out to be a bit of a mess so she finally ended up taking it off, but it didn't keep her from making sure she got to go to every house for candy! There were a lot of families out walking around and it was a really fun night. I think Mike and I were more exhausted than the kids were by the time we got back home! Needless to say it was hard for the kids to get up for school the next morning. :) Thursday Brooklyn got to go back to school. Her rash was much better and she hadn't had a fever for a week so we felt like it was fine for her to go. On our way there, she said, "I bet my 'tends' are saying 'where is brooklyn?" She did well at school and I got to take Kelsey to her gym class again so that was really fun. This weekend was filled with soccer Saturday and Sunday for Braden, but now our soccer season is over. It has been great to get to know families on both Braden and Kayla's teams and the kids have really enjoyed getting to play with new friends too. We have been truly blessed with wonderful friends everywhere we have lived and have felt so supported by our friends through this entire process. Tonight when I was getting Brooklyn ready for bed I was just looking at her thinking, why did you get cancer? How did that happen? It's not fair. She is really so sweet and loving and has such a big heart. I know that she is doing well and everything is going according to schedule and that she will come through all of this as a stronger person, completely cured and great, but until that time comes, it's still hard to see her having to battle this disease. It is hard to know if she acts feisty just because she's strong willed and she is three or if it's because she feels terrible and doesn't know how to express it. It's hard to have to always consider where we are going for the day and if it is a good idea for her to go to a certain place or not. It stinks to have to make sure that no one has a cold if they are coming over to our house. She seems like she is doing great and plays like any normal kid, but as our trip to the hospital showed us last week, we have to be so cautious all the time. And the thing is, we will probably never know where she picked up the virus so it's not like we can just say, well, we won't go there again. You think that you always want a hedge of protection around your kids to make sure they are safe and healthy, with her it's like we need a six foot fence. We know that we are going to get through this time though and that God has a plan for Brooklyn and for our family. Like it says in one of the songs we sing at church, "my faith shall be my guide."